Have you ever gotten bad vibes from one of your children’s friends? Maybe you felt like he/she was a negative influence or was causing your son or daughter to be unhappy. It can be hard to know when you as a parent should get involved and when it’s better to just let things be.
Chances are that you know a woman who has had a miscarriage. It can be difficult to know how to respond when a friend experiences such a tragedy.
LCSW Julie Hanks recently offered her professional insight on the topic to a Woman’s Day article entitled “9 Things Never to Say to a Woman Who’s Had a Miscarriage.” Here’s a quick review of what not to say in this situation:
We each have a long list of personal responsibilities: our finances, careers, bodies, families, etc. It’s critical to be aware of our lives and our needs. But when does self-awareness become self-obsession? Do we think about ourselves too much? Here’s how to determine if you’re self-aware or self-absorbed:
I have the pleasure to speak at the Uplift Families Parenting Conference on September 13th. Hosted by Utah First Lady Jeanette Herbert, this exciting event will feature several prominent presenters who will help us learn to develop and celebrate meaningful child-parent relationships. Come and be inspired as we discuss ways to uplift Utah families! Dinner is included.
My presentation will be focused on an area that parents (especially mothers) often neglect…yep, you guessed it! I’ll be tackling the topic of self-care for parents.
Next month, Julie Hanks will be presenting at Affirmation, a conference dedicated to fostering a loving discussion among LGBT Mormons, their friends and family, and the LDS community. The conference is non-political, but is instead focused on providing healing, love, and support for our LGBT brothers and sisters.
The Deseret News asked Julie a few questions about Affirmation. Here is a bit of the interview:
Q:How did you get involved with Affirmation? How long have you been associated with the group?
A:While I am not officially affiliated with the group, I am a huge supporter of Affirmation’s mission of inclusiveness, love, and support for Mormon LGBT individuals.
Q: What do you hope to communicate with those attending?
A:I hope to communicate a message that every life is valuable and important. No matter where we are on our life’s journey, God’s love for us is infinite, and Jesus Christ’s Atonement is always available as a source of strength and healing. Too often, we think that we have to do something different or be someone different to be worthy of God’s love, but nothing can separate us from the love of God.
As an LDS performing songwriter and a licensed therapist, I plan to share some of my best-loved songs and words of encouragement based on my experiences working with LGBT individuals and their families.
Q:What misconceptions do you think people have about LGBT Mormons and Affirmation?
A: There are so many misconceptions about LGBT Mormons that it’s difficult to know where to start. Here are a few: that being LGBT is a choice, that you can’t be LGBT and participate in the church, that LGBT Mormons want to leave the church, that many LGBT Mormon who have left the church are bitter and want nothing to do with it. None of those things are necessarily true, and we want to help eradicate these myths.
Many people assume that Affirmation is an activist group that is in opposition to the LDS church’s teaching. Affirmation is about creating and maintaining a respectful and healthy dialogue between LGBT Mormons and the broader LDS community that encourages inclusive attitudes and practices.
The Affirmation conference is on September 12-14. Click here for more details and to buy tickets.
Are you tired of reading relationship books with a few tips and advice that may put a band aid on your marital discourse? Dr. Sue Johnson, author of Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations For A Lifetime Of Love, relationship researcher and expert, believes that the attachment bond individuals have with their partners is crucial for a happy, healthy relationship. Just as an infant feels close, attached, and loved when her mother gazes in her eyes, adults have the same need. We innately feel a desire to connect, be loved, depended on, and to feel safe. When the attachment is insecure with our spouse or partner, there is greater likelihood for disconnection, isolation, and distance. Hold Me Tight looks to address that attachment bond.
Wasatch Family Therapy is pleased to announce that we are, once again, offering a Hold Me Tight workshop. Based on Dr. Sue Johnson’s Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) approach. An approach in which empirical research shows that 70-75% of couples move from distress to recovery. The workshop will take readers through the following seven transforming conversations:
Recognizing Demon Dialogues
Finding the Raw Spots
Revisiting a Rocky Moment
Hold Me Tight
Bonding Through Sex and Touch
Keeping Your Love Alive
Join us, LaShawn Schultz CSW and Jameson Holman, for this eight-week course beginning Wednesday nights on October 1st in the Cottonwood Heights location from 6-8 p.m. Register now and find the emotional connection that can come as partners reach for one another, holding tight.
Listen as LCSW Julie Hanks answers a lightening round of “Normal or Not” questions. Is it normal to tuck yourself tightly under the covers? How about stripping down to your skivvies right when you get home from work? Find the answers to all these questions and more!
Conflict is a Normal and even healthy part of life and is unavoidable at times. Conflict stems from differences in values, motivations, or deep personal feelings. Learning to accept or understand the conflict in a healthy way is crucial and can provide an opportunity for growth and strengthened relationships. Mismanaged conflict can lead to chronic stress, feelings of anger, and strained relationships. By learning a few simple Tools for Learning and being real about conflict, conflict will not control your emotions and behavior.
It’s another round of “Normal or Not” with Todd and Erin on Rewind 100.7 where LCSW Julie Hanks fields listeners’ questions. Today’s topic: bedroom issues!
One woman can’t go to bed without doing her hair, and another man gets upset if his wife doesn’t go to bed at the same time as him every night. Listen to the segment to find out if these behaviors are normal or not.
Games are a fun family activity. But how important is winning for children? Should parents play full out, or are there times when they should let kids win?
In an article that’s going viral, a blogger who goes by The Lunchbox Dad says when he and wife “play board games, sports, card games, or hopscotch with our kids-we don’t let them win. We never have.”
LCSW Julie Hanks had the opportunity to discuss this topic with other Studio 5 contributors. Her main view was that games are a good way to teach children that accomplishments do not equal self-worth. If a child loses, a parent can help him/her understand that winning isn’t everything. This is an opportunity to model what a good winner….and a good loser looks like. The comfort of home may be the perfect place for a child to experience losing a competition.
Another point that came up in the discussion is that whether or not parents let their kids win is perhaps best based on their age. Young children may get a much needed confidence boost from feeling that they’ve won, but with teenage kids, parents probably want to bring their A game.