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Recognizing and Healing from Manipulative Relationships: Art of Connection

Recognizing and Healing from Manipulative Relationships: Art of Connection

I recently sat down with Baya Voce, host of The Art of connection, to talk about narcissism, sociopathy, pathological lying, gaslighting and so much more. The biggest take-home message is that anyone can find themselves in a manipulative relationship, and you can heal. For therapy in Utah visit WasatchFamilyTherapy.com Learn more about Baya Voce.

Have you experienced manipulation in a relationship? What were the signs? How did you recover?

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3 Ways to Fight Fair: Good Things Utah

3 Ways to Fight Fair: Good Things Utah

Every significant relationship has times of disagreement and disconnection. Differences are a sign that your relationship is healthy and that both people feel free to bring their authentic selves. However, how you express those differences can either bring you closer together or create distance.

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Assertiveness Guide for Women Book Review on NewSocialWorker.com

Assertiveness Guide for WomenBased on both clinical wisdom from working with women and from her own experiences, Dr. de Azevedo Hanks invites women to embark on a journey to create a stronger sense of clarity, confidence, connection, and compassion by increasing their assertiveness in the areas of their lives that matter most. This book is useful to any woman who desires to increase her assertiveness and is a good tool for clinicians to use when addressing issues of connection, gender, attachment, and assertiveness. This wonderful guide is highly recommended for anyone who wants to be more assertive.

Reviewed by Beth Russell, Ph.D., LCSW, Clinical Associate Professor of Social Work, The College at Brockport for New Social Worker

Read the entire book review here

Download free book chapter of The Assertiveness Guide for Women

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Say Yes to Saying No! Real Simple Magazine Interview

Say Yes to Saying No! Real Simple Magazine Interview

Watch for my advice on getting better at saying “no” in Jan. 2017 Real Simple Magazine cover story!

This month’s Real Simple magazine cover story is about the power of saying NO. I chatted with article writer Jennifer King Lindley and shared tips for setting healthy boundaries.

We are socialized to feel responsible for the feelings and well-being of those around us,” says Julie de Azevedo Hanks, Ph.D. a licensed clinical social worker in Salt Lake City and author of The Assertiveness Guide for Women.

How to say no to a friend who constantly sends emails and invitations for product lines she sells from home?

Be supportive but direct. “I’m so glad you’ve found a passion you can use your great skills in!” suggests Hanks. “But I’m just not interested in buying any candles right now. Humor can help, maybe, “I have enough candles for the rest of my life even if the power was out forever.” End it there or, if you’re close, offer to support her in a way that doesn’t involve your credit card.

My sister is going through a divorce and asked to move in with us until she can get back on her feet. My own marriage is strained, and having her in the house would ratchet up the pressure even more.

Think of your priorities as concentric circles. In the center is you, then your spouse and kids, then your extended family, then friends, then acquaintances,” says Hanks. “Reframe how you think about the decision. You are saying no to save your marriage, not because you are a bad sister.”

There are many other great tips for saying no in the New Year. Pick up your copy at the grocery store, book store, or magazine rack.

Read the entire article here Say Yes to Saying No (pdf download)

Download free chapter of The Assertiveness Guide for Women

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When Your Holidays Aren’t Merry: Dr. Julie Hanks on Mom Show on KSL Radio

When Your Holidays Aren’t Merry: Dr. Julie Hanks on Mom Show on KSL Radio

The pressure to be cheerful and happy during the holidays can be particularly hard for people dealing with grief and loss: the death of a loved one, your first Christmas since being divorced, job loss, or just the passage of time. Lindsay Aerts, host of The Mom Show on KSL Radio, and I sat down to talk about how to manage painful feelings during a time when you’re “supposed” to be merry.

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Preventing Holiday Burnout: Mom Show on KSL Radio

Preventing Holiday Burnout: Mom Show on KSL Radio

 Are you feeling overwhelmed by high expectations and “shoulds”? I sat down with Lindsay Aerts, host of KSL Radio’s The Mom Show to share tips for moms to prevent holiday burnout. Here are a few topics we cover during this interview:

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Assertiveness Guide Book Review on PsychCentral

 From Lean In to The Female Brain, experts from diverse fields, with varying degrees of success, have tried to empower women to best understand their feelings and behaviors and act accordingly. The Assertiveness Guide for Women, by psychotherapist and clinical social worker  Hanks, follows in a similar vein, with the particular goal of helping women improve their communication, set healthy boundaries, and benefit their personal and professional relationships.

It is important to note Hanks’ areas of expertise in considering this book, because they have a significant impact on her approach. Her method is thoroughly imbedded in psychotherapeutic technique and theory, which may limit the scope of its applicability. Indeed, a book that is more concerned with childhood attachment types than the societal obstacles women face each day may not work for everyone.

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How to Communicate So You’ll Be Heard: Dr. Julie Hanks on Love Rice Podcast

How to Communicate So You’ll Be Heard: Dr. Julie Hanks on Love Rice Podcast

Are there ways to approach difficult conversations that will make it more likely that we’ll be heard? Absolutely. I talked with Scabs, host of Love Rice podcast about communication strategies and tips form my newest book The Assertiveness Guide for Women. We share some personal stories about difficult conversations we’ve had recently. In this interview I come off more like a chatty girlfriend than a “professional.” It feels like listening in on two girlfriends talking.

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How to Start Your Own Family Holiday Traditions: Dr. Julie Hanks on KSL Mom Show

How to Start Your Own Family Holiday Traditions: Dr. Julie Hanks on KSL Mom Show

If you’ve decided it’s time to do your own immediate family traditions for the holidays, how do you break it to your extended family that you won’t be joining them this year?  I talk with Lindsay Aerts from KSL Radio’s The Mom Show about how to start the conversation and manage difficult feelings that might arise.

Learn more about The Assertiveness Guide for Women
Get therapy in Utah at WasatchFamilyTherapy.com
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