Blog Section

The Red Flags Of Child Abuse

If you have been wondering what our Director of Child & Adolescent Services, Clair Mellenthin, LCSW, RPT-S has been up to, here are a few of her recent TV segments and magazine articles to catch up on!

The Red Flags of Child Abuse – Fresh Living KUTV

Spring Clean Your Soul – Fresh Living KUTV

I Became a More Peaceful Parent Using These 4 Strategies – Hilary Thompson – MOTHERLY

https://www.mother.ly/life/peaceful-parenting-is-my-goal-and-im-slowly-imperfectly-getting-there?fbclid=IwAR0uq2Ru8_SWC1bK6VFrBGgA2H2Of3XIvVWER6sojQSVxKD2mTNocTBdun4

More

Ask A Therapist: How Can Children Be Protected From Cousins Who Were Sexually Molested?

Q: My daughter’s children are close friends with their cousins.  The parents of these cousins took in foster children who sexually molested the cousins.  My daughter wants to know how best she can protect her children from being molested by the cousins.  All the children involved are younger than 10 years old.  My son was similarly molested by neighbor children and has been struggling with pornography and masturbation for twenty years.  She doesn’t want that to happen to her children.   Where can she go for advice?

A: The first step your daughter can take is to begin to have first of several conversations with her young children about good and bad touch- explaining “good” touch is a hug, a tickle under the armpit, a high five.  A “bad” touch is when someone touches your private parts or asks you to touch theirs.  Talking about what to do if this ever happens is also a topic for conversations throughout their lives- always tell a grownup! She also needs to ask if they have ever experienced “bad touch” to find out if they have also been abused.

Just because the cousins were sexually abused, it does not necessarily mean that they will in turn, molest others or engage in sexually inappropriate behaviors.  If they have not acted out sexually, you do not need to limit their exposure and time together, unless the foster children are still in their home.  To be on the safe side, an adult should be supervising their play for the next few months.  They can still have play dates and engage in normal interactions, but I would suggest that the play just takes place out in the open- no closed doors allowed.  I would also say “no” to sleepovers for the time being.  If the cousins have been acting out sexually because of their abuse, it is okay to limit the play dates and offer support as adult friends/family.

A good resource for your family members is The Association For Play Therapy where you can find play therapists who specialize in treating sexually reactive and abused children in your area.  There are chapters located throughout the United States.

 

Cialis vs Viagra it is old dispute between two similar medicines which stand by the way almost equally. but here not a task how to decide on a choice and to start using one of them. Viagra vs Cialis much kontsentrivany cialis which is on sale in the form of powder and we use it as required emergency. but nevertheless what harm they neninut especially if the birch costs.

More

Ask A Therapist: Anger Issues Due To Childhood Abuse

Q: I have acknowledged the fact that I have an anger problem, but I have not been able to find a way to deal with it. When I get angry I scream, curse, and get verbally abusive with the person that I am angry with. I have broken objects by throwing them across the room or by simply breaking them myself. I have injured myself by punching and kicking walls and random objects. Whenever I try to control my anger I feel light-headed, weak and shaky. After my anger passes I feel frustrated because I couldn’t control myself and break down in tears.

I have seen a therapist before for my anger issues and it only helped me for a couple of days before I was my old self again. While in therapy the therapist handed me a paper with a list of questions, one of the questions being; “have you ever been sexually abused?” I answered no, even though I experienced sexual abuse as a child. When I was 7 I started being abused by a close family member, it lasted until I turned 11 1/2 years old (when I started puberty.) I have never told anybody about it because I feel embarrassed and ashamed of the fact that the abuse lasted for so long. I know that the abuse was not my fault but I find myself constantly blaming myself for it because I never told anyone about it. I’m now 21 years old and I am afraid that I will hurt someone due to my anger. The relationships that I have been in before have not lasted long due to my anger and I’m tired of not being in control of my emotions.

I am seeking advice for what I should do to try and resolve my problem. I know that by talking about my abuse with someone I might be able to let the emotions that I have locked inside out, but I know that I will never be able to talk to someone about it due to the embarrassment that I feel. So I’m kind of at an edge here. Any type of advice would be helpful and greatly appreciated. Thank you for your time.

Click the arrow below to listen to the therapist’s response…

[powerpress]*

To find a therapist who can help resolve your abuse issues click Find Help.  Please visit www.malesurvivor.org for more resources to heal from male childhood sexual abuse.

Take good care of yourself!

Julie Hanks, LCSW

*This is my first Ask the Therapist AUDIO response. What do you think? Like it, hate it? Let me know your thoughts.

Cialis vs Viagra it is old dispute between two similar medicines which stand by the way almost equally. but here not a task how to decide on a choice and to start using one of them. Viagra vs Cialis much kontsentrivany cialis which is on sale in the form of powder and we use it as required emergency. but nevertheless what harm they neninut especially if the birch costs.

More