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Ask A Therapist: Am I Really Bipolar?

Q: I have just recently dealt with the trauma of being molested by a friend’s father. I thought all of my erratic behavior resulted from this, but now I’m hearing that I am Bipolar. I am confused and scared. I have been given lithium, but the doctor has not spoken to my family and only spoke with me once for about 20 minutes. His assistants did separate interviews with me as well. I don’t have insurance so I am paying a lot and don’t if I can afford to get a second opinion.
Facts: I was in a state of depression from February to July 5th. Attempted suicide 3 times. I attempted suicide 2 other times, once at 13 and another at 21. I have also worked overseas and traveled extensively on my own. I feel great when I am traveling. I know several languages (minor) but never stick to one long enough to learn it well, which is a habit in every study I’ve undertaken.  Jobs: Baker, Insurance Sales, Teacher, Prison Guard, Carnival Ride Operator, Counselor, PCorps Volunteer, usually stick to a job for 6-8 months and then move on. I need help.  I have no money and am in serious debt because of the way I’m living.

A: Thanks for writing in. You raise an excellent question: Is your erratic behavior due to sexual abuse history or bipolar disorder, or some combination of trauma and mental illness? While I can’t provide you with a diagnosis in this format, I can point you in the direction to get a psychiatric evaluation to determine whether or not your bipolar disorder is accurate.

I suggest that you get an additional evaluation and second opinion.  There are community resources available for mental health services free or at a reduced fee. Here’s a link to state funded mental health services in Indianapolis, Indiana. Another resource is the Find Help link at the top of this page and here is the link to providers in your city. When you contact them, ask if they have a sliding fee scale based on income. Here’s another link to help you gain more information about the causes, symptoms, treatment of bipolar disorder to empower you in your quest to get an accurate diagnosis and treatment.

Take good care of yourself!

Julie Hanks, LCSW

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Ask A Therapist: Never Alone But Always Lonely

Q: (16 year old young woman in India) I am an intelligent girl. Always one of those A+ types. And like all geeky girls on the planet I have no friends. I do have these bunch of people I hang out with in school but we aren’t really true friends. Once when we had a talk with this career counselor our lunch period got missed. I was supposed to eat from the canteen that day. But since lunch was over the canteen got closed. And my so-called friends happily came to the place where I sit and had their lunch which they had brought from home without offering me a thing! I remained hungry throughout the day.

My parents are separated and like typical chauvinistic men my father can’t think beyond my brother. Whenever we meet he only talks about my brother and his future. My father didn’t even want me to be born!! He had tried to get my mom to abort me.

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Ask A Therapist: My Best Friend Is Suicidal

Q: My best friend is suicidal and I want to know if there is anything I can do to help her. She has already told her parents but they really aren’t doing anything to stop her. I have told a teacher at our school and the counselor but all they do is recommend seeing a psychiatrist. I am really worried about her she almost always has cuts all over her body arms, legs, and stomach. Her mother has been in and out of prison even before she was born. Her mother is also in right now and has been since she was 7. In the past few years she has had a lot happen, she lost her grandmother on her dad’s side two days before Christmas in 2008. Right after that she moved from a big house to a small one and in the process lost connection with her former best friend. Many of her animals outside died and she sat with one of her cats and had to watch it die after it got attacked by a dog. This past year she had her aunt on her dad’s side die and lost a lot of her friends. She also found out that her mother was diagnosed with bipolar disorder by four different psychiatrists and borderline personality disorder by one or two. We were in seventh grade this year and for most of the second semester she was labeled a whore because of how she dresses and who hangs out with. This past summer is also when the cutting started it started off pretty bad but not frequent. It then went to minor burns and small scratches and then blew up again to bad cuts and they were very frequent. At the current moment she only has scars but is thinking about cutting herself again. I would just like an idea of what I could say to her to get her not to cut anymore. Thank you for taking the time to read this (and respond if you do).

A: First of all, your friend is lucky to have such a mature and concerned friend like you. For 13 years old, you are wise to get some advice on how to handle this serious situation. You mentioned that your friend is suicidal. Has she told you that she has plans to end her life or are you suspecting that she is suicidal because of her cutting behavior? Often intentional self-harm, or parasuicidal behavior, is a cry for help without an intention to die. The two are related but don’t necessarily go together.

Does your friend acknowledge that she needs help to address her cutting? If so, she may want to ask her parents to take her to their family doctor. Sometimes parents are more willing to take their child to get “medical” help than “mental” help. Also, have you talked to your parents or guardian about this situation and asked for their help and advice? It may be a good idea to sit down with your friend and both sets of parents and express your love and concern and see how you and your parents can support your friend.  Another possible resource is Childhelp national hotline. You can tell them about your concerns with your friend and they will identify resources in your area.

If your friend’s parents are fully aware that their daughter is cutting and in need of psychological intervention and they refuse to get their daughter the treatment she needs, then this may be a case of medical neglect requiring or your parents to report the situation to child protective services. I hope it doesn’t come to that. Thank you again for writing in to Ask the Therapist.

Take good care of yourself.

Julie Hanks, LCSW

Cialis vs Viagra it is old dispute between two similar medicines which stand by the way almost equally. but here not a task how to decide on a choice and to start using one of them. Viagra vs Cialis much kontsentrivany cialis which is on sale in the form of powder and we use it as required emergency. but nevertheless what harm they neninut especially if the birch costs.

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Ask A Therapist: I’m Angry AND Sad. What’s Wrong With Me?

Q: I’m 15 years old and I have been getting angry for sometime no reason at all and then becoming sad.  I am sad for a long time (10:30a.m.-9:00p.m.).  I don’t know what to do and people ask what’s wrong and i just snap at them and feel even worse and I think I’m losing some of my friends.  I used to be the funny guy but now I’m just the guy that sits in his chair quietly and doesn’t really talk to anyone anymore.  I don’t feel like myself and I’m actually just avoiding people anymore. Please Help, Thank you.

A: How confusing to be having these overwhelming emotions and not know where they came from or why you’re getting upset. I’m so glad you wrote in for help. I’m always relieved when adolescent young men write in for emotional help because so many suffer in silence and don’t know how to reach out for help.

What you’re describing sounds like some kind of depression. You might be surprised to hear that irritability and anger are often signs of depression, especially in adolescents. The changes in your personality and your social behavior also point to depression. Does anyone in your life know how sad you’re feeling? Do you have parents you could talk to or another trusted adult, like a school counselor who could help you find a therapist and set up a medical evaluation?

I urge you to talk to your parents, let them know about your feelings, and ask them to help you find a therapist to meet with. Also, please go to your MD and get a physical to rule out possible medical conditions that might be contributing to your low moods. Click the Find Help at the top of this page to find a therapist in your area who specializes in working with adolescents and depression.

I am so glad that you emailed “Ask the Therapist” to reach out for help and guidance. I am hopeful that it will inspire other young men to pay more attention to their emotions and ask for help when needed.

Take good care of yourself!

Julie Hanks, LCSW

Cialis vs Viagra it is old dispute between two similar medicines which stand by the way almost equally. but here not a task how to decide on a choice and to start using one of them. Viagra vs Cialis much kontsentrivany cialis which is on sale in the form of powder and we use it as required emergency. but nevertheless what harm they neninut especially if the birch costs.

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Ask A Therapist: How Do I Get Over My Ex-Boyfriend?

relaxQ: Hi…My problem is that my boyfriend broke up with me 2 weeks ago. we already planned to go to Hawaii and I have to go because I can’t pay him back since it’s really expensive. We decided to be friends, when I’m around him I want to be his friend and that’s the only thing I think about but when I’m not around him, I start missing him so much. I keep telling myself that I want him to be my friend nothing more, I don’t want to go to back to him and he doesn’t either but I miss him so much and want to be around him all the time. The trip is in 2 weeks and were gonna spend 10 days together there. I’m scared that I will get hurt and after we get back from Hawaii, I will start missing him more and get hurt even more. Please help me, I seriously have no idea of what to do and no one can help me out. I have finals coming in a week and I really don’t want anything to affect my studying.

A: Don’t go to Hawaii with someone who just broke up with you, even if you have to forfeit money. Focus on your studies and on moving forward with your life. This is a chance to learn how to tolerate missing him, and process the grief. You may want to talk with a counselor through your college.

Click the arrow below to listen to my audio response.

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Creative Commons License photo credit: janineomg

Cialis vs Viagra it is old dispute between two similar medicines which stand by the way almost equally. but here not a task how to decide on a choice and to start using one of them. Viagra vs Cialis much kontsentrivany cialis which is on sale in the form of powder and we use it as required emergency. but nevertheless what harm they neninut especially if the birch costs.

More

How Do I Get Over My Ex-Boyfriend?

relaxHi…My problem is that my boyfriend broke up with me 2 weeks ago. we already planned to go to Hawaii and I have to go because I can’t pay him back since it’s really expensive. We decided to be friends, when I’m around him I want to be his friend and that’s the only thing I think about but when I’m not around him, I start missing him so much. I keep telling myself that I want him to be my friend nothing more, I don’t want to go to back to him and he doesn’t either but I miss him so much and want to be around him all the time. The trip is in 2 weeks and were gonna spend 10 days together there. I’m scared that I will get hurt and after we get back from Hawaii, I will start missing him more and get hurt even more. Please help me, I seriously have no idea of what to do and no one can help me out. I have finals coming in a week and I really don’t want anything to affect my studying.

A: Don’t go to Hawaii with someone who just broke up with you, even if you have to forfeit money. Focus on your studies and on moving forward with your life. This is a chance to learn how to tolerate missing him, and process the grief. You may want to talk with a counselor through your college.

Click the arrow below to listen to my audio response.

Play

Creative Commons License photo credit: janineomg

Cialis vs Viagra it is old dispute between two similar medicines which stand by the way almost equally. but here not a task how to decide on a choice and to start using one of them. Viagra vs Cialis much kontsentrivany cialis which is on sale in the form of powder and we use it as required emergency. but nevertheless what harm they neninut especially if the birch costs.

More