Blog Section

New Year, New Year’s Resolutions?

As the new year dawned earlier this week, many of us used it as a time to reflect on 2018 and make resolutions for what we want to change in the coming year. Maybe we want to lose some holiday weight, get a better grip on our finances, improve ourselves by learning something new, or change our career/life path. Admittedly, all admirable aspirations (as demonstrated by the fact that these are a few of the most common resolutions…year after year). However, as the shininess of the new year starts to wear off and the doldrums of February start to set in, we lose motivation and nearly 80% of us that made resolutions will have given up, according to U.S. News and World Reports. Yep, 80% will have thrown in the towel by Valentine’s Day! Then why do we keep making New Year’s resolutions year after year and how can we be part of the 20% that makes it past the middle of February?

The connotation of the word resolution is negative to a lot of people, something to be solved or fix. Thus, how many of us are looking at our resolutions as a way of fixing something that we perceive is broken about us? Instead of highlighting the potential for growth and positive change we are starting out focusing on the negatives that we see in ourselves. Whereas the word goal has a much more positive connotation, it’s defined by Oxford’s dictionary as an aim or an object of person’s ambition or effort. A goal is something that we work towards, we aim to achieve unlike a resolution that is putting an end to a problem. Funny how our minds can differentiate subconsciously, and our reactions are influenced by the distinction. How can we make goals that we can stick with for longer than six weeks? Breaking them down into smaller, more manageable goals that allow us to feel successful. That’s right, setting yourself up for success can be key to achieving your goals. Let’s break down one of the more common resolutions of “being healthier”.

Not too General- the goal needs to be specific, “being healthier” is rather vague and ambiguous. State your intent in more specific terms, “I want to be healthier by eating more vegetables.”

Objective- the goal needs to be measurable and trackable. In our example, the word “more” can be construed as subjective. More as compared to what exactly? We can refine the goal further to make it easier to quantify and measure, “5 servings of vegetables a day”.

Achievable- remember we are setting ourselves up for success with our goals, we want to meet them, so we must make sure we are setting reasonable expectations. What if you hate vegetables and never eat them outside of french fries? Is our goal of 5 servings of vegetables a day attainable? Maybe, maybe not. You can refine the goal even further to make it more manageable, “Eat 1 serving of vegetables with lunch and 2 servings with dinner.” Remember if you feel successful you are more likely to be motivated to continue expanding and working toward higher goals.

Lifetime/Lifestyle- is the goal something that you can continue doing indefinitely? Maybe for the rest of your life? Lasting change is about creating new processes of how we think, feel, and react to stimuli so if we have a “diet” mindset then we are constantly looking forward to being done with the “diet”.

By breaking down goals into manageable pieces we are telling ourselves that we want to be successful and that we can do the things that we set our minds to. Start 2019 by setting a goal to ditch the resolutions of the past and succeed in achieving your goals for the future. Happy goal setting!

More

‘Help Your Child Thrive in School and Beyond’ – National School Psychology Awareness Week 2015

SCHOOL KIDS

This week happens to be National School Psychology Awareness Week. In an effort to promote our profession and  provide an understanding of what it is that we do – because it seems to be ever evolving, changing, and growing –  each year the national association designates a week in November to present a message to the public about school psychology.

Helping Students and Families Connect the Dots and Thrive in School and Beyond.

School psychologists are trained to support and help students build their strengths, skills and abilities and realize their goals. Specifically, we have the expertise in mental health, learning, and behavior to help children  and youth succeed academically, socially, behaviorally, and emotionally. We help students build upon their strengths, skills, interests, and abilities to ‘connect the dots’ and thrive. This includes helping them identify and plan ways to accomplish short and long term goals, building better relationships, and finding ways to keep going even when things get tough.

As many in our community may wrestle with high emotion and confusing thoughts and opinions related to incredibly important matters of faith, family, belief, and hope for the future, being accepting and loving towards everyone, even those that are very different from us, while challenging, may be more important than ever. Kids in school, especially as they get older, become notoriously peer focused! Who is getting the A? Who has the coolest phone? Who does the teacher call on the most? Who got asked to the dance? Etc. Etc. Supporting our kids to be true to themselves, yet accepting of others can be such a difficult task.

More

Help With Homework? Re-frame Your Approach This Year

SCHOOL KIDS

The school year is now underway, and for most of us, that can only mean one thing. It’s just a matter of days before ‘it’ begins, ‘mom, where is my science book? I know it was in my book bag and now it’s gone!’ or ‘dad, YOU SAID you would help me with my English!’ Homework season has begun.

When did homework become so intense, so stressful? Does it have to be this way? Here are just a few ideas to re-frame the homework experience to make it easier on you and help you remember why we do it at all.

Pro or con, the homework debate has been going on for as long as most of us can remember. How much is enough? Is it worth it? Should you monitor your child? Most research leans towards yes, generally speaking, though not always in the way we might think. Overall, a good rule of thumb is approximately 10 minutes per grade, so a first grader completes about 10 minutes, and so on.

More

Successful Practices for Dual-Earner Families

canstockphoto2311099(1)

Can children raised in dual-income households be happier than children raised by a stay-at-home parent?  According to a landmark survey done by Ellen Galinsky (1999, 2005) the answer is yes!  Galinsky found that children overwhelmingly endorse having both fathers and mothers working.  It appears that the concern over who should work and how much they should work is largely limited to us as parents.

So what do children worry about?  Through Galinsky’s surveys she found that children are focused on the time they have with their parents at home.  They are concerned that when their parents are home, they be less stressed and tired and more emotionally available to them.  Insert therapy buzzword [balance].

As parents we strive for balance, and whether or not they tell us directly, our children desire a balanced home.  Here are ten practices that can support you and your partner as you work to attain balance in your home.

-Prioritize family time and well-being

-Emphasize overall equality and partnership, including joint decision making, equal influence over finances, and joint responsibility for housework

-Equally value each other’s work and life goals

-Share parental duties and “emotional work” of family life

-Maximize paly and fun at home

-Concentrate on work while at the workplace (If your home is also your workplace, make sure there is a well defined boundary between workspace/work time, and family space/family time)

-Take pride in family and in balancing multiple roles, and believing the family benefits from both parents working (rather than adsorbing the dominant cultural narrative of harm)

-Live simply, which includes limiting activities that impede active family engagement

-Adopt high but realistic expectations about household management; employing planning strategies that save time

-Be proactive in decision making and remain conscious of time’s value

 

Adapted from Normal Family Processes: Growing Diversity and Complexity, Fourth Edition By Froma Walsh PhD MSW

Cialis vs Viagra it is old dispute between two similar medicines which stand by the way almost equally. but here not a task how to decide on a choice and to start using one of them. Viagra vs Cialis much kontsentrivany cialis which is on sale in the form of powder and we use it as required emergency. but nevertheless what harm they neninut especially if the birch costs.

More

4 Ways to Stop Procrastinating Sharecare Article

canstockphotoHave you ever had a task that you kept putting off?  Maybe it was only for a day or two, but maybe it was for weeks or even months.  Procrastination is something we all experience from time to time, but thankfully there are steps we can take to minimize this problem.

Julie Hanks shares her personal and professional insight on ways to beat procrastination in an article on Dr. Oz’s Sharecare.  Here’s an outline of a few of her ideas:

1)  Know Your Patterns

2)  Break Tasks into Smaller Chunks

3)  Go for “Good Enough”

4)  Use Deadlines to Help Focus and Motivate

 

Click here for the full article on how to stop procrastinating for good!

Cialis vs Viagra it is old dispute between two similar medicines which stand by the way almost equally. but here not a task how to decide on a choice and to start using one of them. Viagra vs Cialis much kontsentrivany cialis which is on sale in the form of powder and we use it as required emergency. but nevertheless what harm they neninut especially if the birch costs.

More