Deep Breathing… How Can This Possibly Make Me Feel Better?
A lot of therapists do deep breathing exercises with their clients and what’s going through your mind might be… does that really do anything? How can just breathing help make me feel better? I breathe all the time and it’s never helped me before! Well, here are a few benefits of deep breathing:
1) Deep breathing increases the amount of oxygen you take in which then releases tension in your body
2) Deep breathing massages your organs increasing and improving circulation
3) Deep breathing can actually strengthen and tone your stomach… who doesn’t want that?
4) Deep breathing can actually help you burn up excess fat… also something we all want
5) Deep breathing increases oxygen levels right? Increasing the amount of oxygen gives you more energy!
6) Deep breathing increases the pleasure chemicals in your brain making you feel happier and can even combat physical pain
7) If you put your mind into concentrating on ‘inhaling’ and ‘exhaling’ it clears your mind of whatever you were previously thinking about giving you a break from the stresses in your life, depressed thoughts, etc. How? Your mind can only think of one thing at one time so you’re concentrating on breathing and not anything else.
Just 15-20 minutes a day can help you feel better and give you all of those benefits. We all have 15 minutes right?
Dealing With Whiners: Julie Hanks quoted in Wall Street Journal
That woman in the center looks vaguely familiar…Only day of my life that I’ll buy 5 Wall Street Journal newspapers.
Read article “Nation of Whiners, Therapists Try Tough Love” online
Read the WSJ dealing with a whiner chat transcript
Wise Mind Workshop Presented by Rape Recovery Center
The Rape Recovery center is offering a ten-week mindfulness workshop for women impacted by sexual violence beginning June 18th.
Areas of focus include:
- Empowerment
- Connection to Self
- Impact of Trauma
- Working with Emotional Responses
- Managing Distress
- Boundaries in Relationships
- Assertiveness
For more information please contact the Rape Recovery Center 2035 South 1300 East Salt Lake City, Utah 801.467.7282.
Ask A Therapist: My Husband Takes No Responsibility and Moves From Job To Job
Q: I need help! My husband takes no responsibility and jumps from the one job to the next. I have a lot of financial stress on me as I have supported him and his two children for more than a year when he was without a job. Now he is in the same predicamment. When he does have a job it is as if he doesnt care and blames the job if they find fault with him. I cannot handle this anymore. What must I do?
A: I am glad you reached out. I think you would be surprised to know how many feel they are in a similar situation, especially in the last several years with the economic downturn. It can often be draining and difficult to feel like you must support everyone, or all the weight is on your shoulders, especially when you would like to share, or expect to share the load.
From your question it sounds like something is going on for your husband, however the reason for this bouncing from one job to the next could be a result of several different sources. It may be that your husband is trying to defer some insecurity in himself outwardly onto his employers. When people do not feel confident in their own abilities, and perform accordingly, it is easier to put the blame on someone else. Or, it is possible that these behaviors could result from depression or anxiety. There are many possibilities, but the result often indicates that something is going on below the surface.
My recommendation for you, if you feel comfortable with this and think it would go well with your husband, would be to have some conversations discussing your desire to have a partnership in the marriage. Discuss how you would like to share the financial drains and how you are feeling about the situation (try to stay with yourself and your own feelings). I would stress your desire to feel a companionship with him.
I would also recommend seeking some professional help. It seems from your comments that this stress may be affecting your ability to connect with your spouse. When you cannot connect, the stressors often feel more overwhelming. Obtaining professional help should not only help your relationship with your husband and your ability to communicate these stressors with him, but also discuss whatever insecurities/depression/anxiety, etc may be present for him that may be getting in the way of being successful in his employment.
Good luck and take good care of yourself,
5 Signs ‘Blog Stalking’ Has Crossed The Line: Studio 5
Lots of women follow people we like and admire online; a favorite DIY blog or a former high school classmate on Facebook. But when does “blog stalking” cross the line into an obsession that’s not so health? In this fun segment therapist, Julie Hanks, LCSW has five signs to watch for.
1) You post more often on their page than on your own
2) You think about them when you’re doing other things (or you answer question for them on their blog/page)
3) You talk about them in conversations as if you’re close friends
4) People can tell who you follow online when they meet you
5) Your real-life responsibilities and relationships are neglected
What are your favorites blogs to follow? Have you ever been guilty of blog-stalking?
Children’s Mental Health Awareness: Myths
Myths About Child Mental Health
Due to the stigma attached to mental health many children do not receive the care that they need. People – adults and children – are afraid to get help and feel shame about their mental disorder. Here are a few myths about child mental health disorders.
1. A child with a mental disorder is damaged for life.
Early intervention can be very effective in preventing problems from becoming worse. Managing symptoms and getting treatment will likely stop the effects and increase likelihood for success in the future.
2. Psychiatric disorders result from personal weakness.
It is definitely hard to separate out problems from a personality. Often things like ADHD and aggressiveness can be deemed as just part of one’s personality but some disorders are genetic and have biological origins.
3. Psychiatric disorders result from bad parenting.
Home environment and relationships can possibly exacerbate disorders but don’t cause them. Parents actually have the opportunity to play a role in recovery and provide support.
4. A child can manage a psychiatric disorder through willpower.
People tend to resist mental health services because they are afraid of the stigma attached to the words. Unfortunately kids don’t have the skills to handle these things for themselves, which is why they are still a problem. Getting help is a benefit and can help them in achieving coping skills to lessen the effects.
5. Therapy for kids is a waste of time.
Talk therapy might be a waste of time, but these days there are many different techniques to help children that don’t necessarily involve talking and involve children at earlier ages. Earlier interventions actually have the most impact.
6. Children are over-medicated.
Medication is not actually the norm. Only 5% of those affected by psychiatric disorder are actually medicated. If medication is effective it will be suggested, but clinicians give serious thought before turning to medication.
7. Children grow out of mental health problems.
Most children actually grow into their mental health problem instead of growing out of it. Problems left untreated affect them as they age into adulthood and may even become worse and lead to issues like substance abuse or involvement with the law.
Getting help for your child will benefit them more than waiting and hoping it will go away or resolve itself with time. Many children have mental health problems and deserve to get the help they need. 15 million children suffer from a mental health related problem – it is common and everyone deserves the opportunity to be treated no matter how old they are.
Can Men & Women Be Just Friends: KSL Radio Interview
Can men and women be “just friends”? Do men and women feel differently about their platonic friendships? Ethan and Alex of KSL Radio’s The Nightside Project invited me to chat with them about an article
Just friends? Guys reveal sexual interest in gal pals (MSNBC)
Listen to my KSL Nightside Project interview (9:20)
Are We A Boring Couple? Julie Hanks quoted in Cosmopolitan
Do you ever compare yourself and your marriage to other couples who do exotic vacations, creative dates, and seem to be a lot more interesting than you and your spouse? I chatted with writer Kristina Grish, also a married woman, and gave her my thoughts on this topic for a Cosmopolitan article.
Are We Boring? (pdf download)
Ask A Therapist: Eating Disorder, Depression, Insomnia, & Cutting
Q: I have an eating disorder, depression, insomnia, and now I’ve started cutting. No one cares. My mom said things could be worse. My dad ignores it. My boyfriend says its in my mind and I can get over it on my own. I’ve started cutting and no one knows and it’s embarrassing. I need help. What should I do? (24 yr old female college student)
A: Click the arrow below to hear my response to your question…
Click here to find a therapist in your area
Take good care of yourself!
